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Wednesday, May 27, 2015

CATHOLIC SCHOOL



I was thirty-nine years old when I began Catholic school. Now I'm sixty-six and still haven't graduated. Meanwhile I praise God for all my classmates.  ~ Dale Lund

You will find here below the following things to learn and memorize that will help you in the Faith:

Act of Charity
Act of Contrition
Act of Faith
Act of Hope
Agnes Dei
The Angelus
Anima Christi
Apostles' Creed
The Beatitudes
Benedictus
The Cardinal Virtues
The Chief Corporal Works of Mercy
The Chief Spiritual Works of Mercy
Confiteor
Dedication of the Twelve Months of the Year
The Divine Praises
Effects of Mortal Sin
Effects of Original Sin on Every Person
Evening Prayer
The Fatima Decade Prayer
Four Last Things
The Four Marks of the Church
The Gloria
Glory Be
Grace Before Meals
Hail, Holy Queen
The Hail Mary
Holy Days of Obligation in the United States
Kyrie
Last Prayer of the Rosary
The Magnificat
The Memorare
The Mysteries of the Holy Rosary
The Nicene Creed
The Nine Choirs of Angels
O Salutaris
The Our Father
Prayer to Our Guardian Angel
Prayer to the Holy Ghost
The Precepts of the Church
Regina Coeli
Sanctus
The Seven Deadly Sins and the Opposite Virtues
The Seven Sacraments
The Sign of the Cross
Sins Against God the Holy Ghost
Sins Crying to Heaven for Vengeance
The Sorrows of Mary
Stations of the Cross
Tantum Ergo
The Ten Commandments
The Theological Virtues
The Twelve Apostles
Ways of Being an Accessory to Another's Sin



ACT OF CHARITY

O My God, I love Thee above all things with my whole heart and soul, because Thou art all-good and deserving of all my love. I love my neighbor as myself for the love of Thee. I forgive all who have injured me and ask pardon of all whom I have injured.  Amen.

ACT OF CONTRITION

O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended Thee, and I detest all my sins, because I dread the loss of heaven, and the pains of hell; but most of all because they offend Thee, my God, Who are all good and deserving of all my love. I firmly resolve, with the help of Thy grace, to confess my sins, to do penance, and to amend my life.  Amen.

ACT OF FAITH

O my God, I firmly believe that thou art one God in three Divine Persons: the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost. I believe that Thy Divine Son became man and died for our sins, and that He shall come to judge the living and the dead. I believe these and all the truths which the Holy Catholic Church teaches, because Thou has revealed them, who canst neither deceive nor be deceived.  Amen.

ACT OF HOPE

O my God, relying on Thy almighty power and infinite mercy and promises, I hope to obtain the pardon of my sins with the help of Thy grace, and life everlasting, through the merits of Jesus Christ, my Lord and my Redeemer.  Amen.

AGNUS DEI

Lamb of God, who takest away the sins of the world, have mercy on us.
Lamb of God, who takest away the sins of the world, have mercy on us.
Lamb of God, who takest away the sins of the world, grant us peace.

THE ANGELUS

V.  The Angel of the Lord declared to Mary:
R.  And she conceived of the Holy Spirit.
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee; blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
V.  Behold the handmaid of the Lord:
R.  Be it done unto me according to Thy word.
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee; blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
V.  And the Word was made Flesh:
R.  And dwelt among us.
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee; blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
V.  Pray for us, O Holy Mother of God,
R.  That we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.
Let us pray:
Pour forth, we beseech Thee, O Lord, Thy grace into our hearts; that we, to whom the incarnation of Christ, Thy Son, was made known by the message of an angel, may by His Passion and Cross be brought to the glory of His Resurrection, through the same Christ Our Lord.  Amen.

ANIMA CHRISTI

Soul of Christ, sanctify me. Body of Christ, save me. Blood of Christ, inebriate me. Water from Christ's side, wash me. Passion of Christ, strengthen me. O good Jesus, hear me. Within Thy wounds hide me. Suffer me not to be separated from Thee. From the malicious enemy defend me. In the hour of my death call me. And bid me come unto Thee that I may praise Thee, with Thy saints and with Thy angels, forever and ever.  Amen

APOSTLES' CREED

I believe in God, the Father Almighty, Creator of heaven and earth; and in Jesus Christ, His only Son, Our Lord; who was conceived by the Holy Spirit, born of the Virgin Mary, suffered under Pontius Pilate, was crucified, died and was buried. He descended into hell; the third day He arose again from the dead; He ascended into heaven, sitteth at the right hand of God the Father Almighty; from thence He shall come to judge the living and the dead. I believe in the Holy Spirit, the Holy Catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body, and life everlasting.  Amen.

THE BEATITUDES

Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
Blessed are the meek: for they shall possess the land.
Blessed are they who mourn: for they shall be comforted.
Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after justice: for they shall have their fill.
Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.
Blessed are the clean of heart: for they shall see God.
Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.
Blessed are they that suffer persecution for justice' sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

BENEDICTUS

Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord. Hosanna in the highest.

THE CARDINAL VIRTUES

Prudence
Justice
Fortitude
Temperance

THE CHIEF CORPORAL WORKS OF MERCY

Feed the hungry.
Give drink to the thirsty.
Clothe the naked.
Shelter the homeless.
Visit the sick.
Visit the imprisoned.
Bury the dead.

THE CHIEF SPIRITUAL WORKS OF MERCY

Admonish the sinner.
Instruct the ignorant.
Counsel the doubtful.
Comfort the sorrowful.
Bear wrongs patiently.
Forgive all injuries.
Pray for the living and the dead.

CONFITEOR

I confess to almighty God and to you, my brothers and sisters, that I have greatly sinned in my thoughts and in my words, in what I have done and in what I have failed to do, through my fault, through my fault, through my most grievous fault; therefore I ask blessed Mary ever-Virgin, all the Angels and Saints, and you, my brothers and sisters, to pray for me to the Lord our God.

DEDICATION OF THE TWELVE MONTHS OF THE YEAR

January.........The Holy Name
February.......The Passion of Our Lord
March...........St. Joseph
April.............The Holy Eucharist
May..............Our Lady
June..............The Sacred Heart
July...............The Most Precious Blood
August..........The Immaculate Heart of Mary
September....Our Lady of Sorrows
October........The Most Holy Rosary
November....The Holy Souls
December.....The Divine Infancy

THE DIVINE PRAISES

Blessed be God.
Blessed be His holy Name.
Blessed be Jesus Christ, true God and true Man.
Blessed be the name of Jesus.
Blessed be His Most Sacred Heart.
Blessed be Jesus in the Most Holy Sacrament of the Altar.
Blessed be the great Mother of God, Mary most holy.
Blessed be her holy and Immaculate Conception.
Blessed be the name of Mary, Virgin and Mother.
Blessed be Saint Joseph, her most chaste Spouse.
Blessed be God in His Angels and in His Saints.

EFFECTS OF MORTAL SIN

Deprived of sanctifying grace.
Makes the soul an enemy of God.
Takes away the merit of good actions.
Deprives the soul of Heaven.
Makes the soul deserving of hell.

EFFECTS OF ORIGINAL SIN ON EVERY PERSON

Loss of sanctifying grace.
Loss of the right to Heaven.
Subject to death and suffering.
Strong inclination to evil.
Driven from the Garden of Paradise.

EVENING PRAYER

Jesus Christ my God, I adore Thee and thank Thee for all the graces Thou hast given me this day. I offer Thee my sleep and all the moments of this night, and I beseech Thee to keep me without sin. Wherefore I put myself within Thy sacred Side and under the mantle of our Lady, my Mother. Let Thy holy Angels stand about me and keep me in peace; and let Thy blessing be upon me.  Amen.

THE FATIMA DECADE PRAYER

O my Jesus, forgive us our sins, save us from the fires of hell. Lead all souls to heaven, especially those who are in most need of Thy mercy.  Amen.

FOUR LAST THINGS

Death
Judgment
Hell
Heaven

THE FOUR MARKS OF THE CHURCH

One
Holy
Catholic
Apostolic

THE GLORIA

Glory to God in the highest. And on earth peace to men of good will. We praise You. We bless You. We adore you. We glorify You. We give You thanks for Your great glory. O Lord God, heavenly King, God the Father almighty. O Lord Jesus Christ, the Only-begotten Son. O Lord God, Lamb of God, Son of the Father: you Who take away the sins of the world, have mercy on us. You Who take away the sins of the world, receive our prayer. You Who sit at the right hand of the Father, have mercy on us. For you alone are holy. You alone are the Lord. You alone, O Jesus Christ, are most high. Together with the Holy Spirit in the glory of God the Father. Amen.

GLORY BE

Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Ghost. As it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end.  Amen

GRACE BEFORE MEALS

Bless us, O Lord, and these Thy gifts, which we are about to receive from Thy bounty through Christ, Our Lord.  Amen.

HAIL, HOLY QUEEN  (Salve Regina)

Hail, holy Queen, mother of mercy, our life, our sweetness, and our hope. To thee do we cry, poor banished children of Eve. To thee do we send up our sighs mourning and weeping in this valley of tears. Turn then, most gracious advocate, thine eyes of mercy toward us, and after this our exile show us the blessed fruit of thy womb, Jesus. O clement, O loving, O sweet Virgin Mary.
V.  Pray for us, O Holy Mother of God.
R.  That we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.

THE HAIL MARY

Hail Mary, full of grace. The Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.  Amen.

HOLY DAYS OF OBLIGATION IN THE UNITED STATES

Christmas Day - December 25
Solemnity of Mary, Mother of God - January 1
The Ascension - 40 days after Easter, celebrated on following Sunday
The Assumption - August 15
All Saints' Day - November 1
The Immaculate Conception - December 8

KYRIE

P.  Lord, have mercy on us.
R.  Lord, have mercy on us.
P.  Christ, have mercy on us.
R.  Christ, have mercy on us.
P.  Lord, have mercy on us.
R.  Lord, have mercy on us.

LAST PRAYER OF THE ROSARY

O God, whose only begotten Son, by His life, death, and resurrection has purchased for us the rewards of eternal salvation, grant, we beseech thee, that by meditating on these mysteries of the most Holy Rosary of the Blessed Virgin Mary, we may imitate what they contain, and obtain what they promise. Through the same Christ our Lord.  Amen.

THE MAGNIFICAT

My soul doth magnify the Lord: And my spirit hath rejoiced in God my Saviour. Because He hath regarded the humility of His handmaid: for, behold, from henceforth all generations shall call me blessed. For He that is mighty hath done great things to me: and holy is His Name. And His mercy is from generation unto generations, to them that fear Him. He hath showed might with His arm: He hath scattered the proud in the conceit of their heart. He hath put down the mighty from their seat, and hath exalted the humble. He hath filled the hungry with good things: and the rich he hath sent empty away. He hath received Israel His servant, being mindful of His mercy: As He spoke to our fathers, to Abraham and to his seed for ever.

THE MEMORARE

Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection, implored thy help, and sought thy intercession was left unaided. Inspired with this confidence, I fly unto thee, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother. To thee I come; before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy clemency hear and answer them.  Amen.

THE MYSTERIES OF THE HOLY ROSARY

The Five Joyful Mysteries:
-The Annunciation
-The Visitation
-The Nativity
-The Presentation
-The Finding in the Temple
The Five Sorrowful Mysteries:
-The Agony in the Garden
-The Scourging at the Pillar
-The Crowning with Thorns
-The Carrying of the Cross
-The Crucifixion
The Five Luminous Mysteries:
-The Baptism
-The Wedding at Cana
-The Proclamation of the Kingdom
-The Transfiguration
-The Institution of the Eucharist
The Five Glorious Mysteries:
-The Resurrection
-The Ascension
-The Descent of the Holy Spirit
-The Assumption
-The Coronation of Our Lady

NICENE CREED

I believe in one God, the Father almighty, maker of heaven and earth, of all things visible and invisible.
I believe in one Lord Jesus Christ, the Only Begotten Son of God, born of the Father before all ages. God from God, Light from Light, true God from true God, begotten, not made, consubstantial with the Father; through him all things were made. For us men and for our salvation he came down from heaven, and by the Holy Spirit was incarnate of the Virgin Mary, and became man. For our sake he was crucified under Pontius Pilate, he suffered death and was buried, and rose again on the third day in accordance with the Scriptures. He ascended into heaven and is seated at the right hand of the Father. He will come again in glory to judge the living and the dead and his kingdom will have no end.
I believe in the Holy Spirit, the Lord, the giver of life, who proceeds from the Father and the Son, who with the Father and the Son is adored and glorified, who has spoken through the prophets.
I believe in one, holy, catholic and apostolic Church. I confess one Baptism for the forgiveness of sins and I look forward to the resurrection of the dead and the life of the world to come.  Amen.

THE NINE CHOIRS OF ANGELS

Cherubim
Seraphim
Thrones
Dominions
Principalities
Powers
Virtues
Archangels
Angels

O SALUTARIS

O Sacrifice for our salvation, who Gate of Heaven opens wide, our enemies press hard around us. Assist us strongly, be our guide.
To the One and Triune God, be glory and eternal praise. May He grant us life forever and to our home our souls upraise.  Amen.

THE OUR FATHER

Our Father, Who art in heaven, hallowed be Thy Name. Thy Kingdom come, Thy Will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.  Amen.

PRAYER TO OUR GUARDIAN ANGEL

Angel of God, my guardian dear, to whom God's love commits me here; ever this day be at my side, to light and guard, to rule and guide.  Amen.

PRAYER TO THE HOLY GHOST

Come, Holy Ghost, fill the hearts of thy faithful and kindle in them the fire of thy love. Send forth thy Spirit, and they shall be created; and Thou shalt renew the face of the earth.
Let us pray. O God, who did instruct the Apostles by the light of the Holy Spirit, grant us in this same Spirit to be truly wise, and ever rejoice in His consolation. Through Christ our Lord.  Amen.

THE PRECEPTS OF THE CHURCH

-To hear Mass on Sundays, and all Holy Days of Obligation.
-To fast and abstain on the days commanded.
-To confess our sins at least once a year.
-To receive Holy Communion during the Easter time.
-To contribute to the support of our pastors.
-Not to solemnize marriage at the forbidden times; not to marry persons within certain degrees of kindred, or otherwise prohibited by the Church.

REGINA COELI

Queen of Heaven, rejoice, alleluia: For He whom you did merit to bear, alleluia. Has risen, as he said, alleluia. Pray for us to God, alleluia. Rejoice and be glad, O Virgin Mary, alleluia, for the Lord has truly risen, alleluia.
Let us pray. O God, who gave joy to the world through the resurrection of Thy Son, our Lord Jesus Christ, grant we beseech Thee, that through the intercession of the Virgin Mary, His Mother, we may obtain the joys of everlasting life. Through the same Christ our Lord.  Amen.

SANCTUS

Holy, Holy, Holy, Lord God of Hosts. Heaven and earth are full of Thy Glory. Hosanna in the highest.

THE SEVEN DEADLY SINS AND THE OPPOSITE VIRTUES

Pride..................Humility
Covetousness....Liberality
Lust...................Chastity
Anger................Meekness
Gluttony............Temperance
Envy..................Brotherly Love
Sloth..................Diligence

THE SEVEN SACRAMENTS

Baptism
Holy Eucharist
Confirmation
Confession
Marriage
Holy Orders
Extreme Unction

THE SIGN OF THE CROSS

In the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit.  Amen.

SINS AGAINST GOD THE HOLY GHOST

Presumption of God's Mercy
Despair
Impugning the known Truth
Envy at another's spiritual good
Obstinacy in Sin
Final Impenitence

SINS CRYING TO HEAVEN FOR VENGEANCE

Willful Murder
Sodomy
Oppression of the poor
Defrauding laborers of their wages

THE SORROWS OF MARY

1.  The Prophecy of St. Simeon
2.  The Flight into Egypt
3.  The Three Days' Loss
4.  Meeting Jesus with the Cross
5.  The Crucifixion
6.  The Taking Down from the Cross
7.  The Burial of Jesus

STATIONS OF THE CROSS

1.  Jesus is condemned to death.
2.  Jesus is made to carry His Cross.
3.  Jesus falls the First Time.
4.  Jesus meets His Sorrowful Mother.
5.  Simon of Cyrene helps Jesus to carry His Cross.
6.  Veronica wipes the face of Jesus.
7.  Jesus falls the Second Time.
8.  The Women of Jerusalem weep over Jesus.
9.  Jesus falls the Third Time.
10.  Jesus is stripped of His Garments.
11.  Jesus is nailed to the Cross.
12.  Jesus is raised upon the Cross and dies.
13.  Jesus is taken down from the Cross and placed in the arms of His Mother.
14.  Jesus is laid in the Sepulchre.

TANTUM ERGO

So great a sacrament, therefore, let us revere while kneeling down. Let old laws yield to this new rite. Let faith, not sense, conviction ground.
Praise and jubilation to the Father; honor, virtue, blessing to the Son; and to the One Who proceeds from both in equal measure may praise be sung.  Amen.

THE TEN COMMANDMENTS

1.  I am the Lord thy God. Thou shalt not have strange gods before Me.*
2.  Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain.
3.  Remember thou keep holy the Sabbath day.
4.  Honor thy father and thy mother.
5.  Thou shalt not kill.
6.  Thou shalt not commit adultery.
7.  Thou shalt not steal.
8.  Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor.
9.  Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife.
10.  Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's goods.

*Protestants have as the second commandment "Thou shalt not make for thyself a graven image..." which is part of the first commandment. To keep the number at ten, Protestants have combined the ninth and tenth commandments.

THE THEOLOGICAL VIRTUES

Faith
Hope
Charity

THE TWELVE APOSTLES

Simon Peter
Andrew
James the Greater
John
Philip
Bartholomew
Matthew
Thomas
James the Less
Simon Zelotes
Jude
Judas Iscariot, who was replaced by Matthias

WAYS OF BEING AN ACCESSORY TO ANOTHER'S SIN

1.  By Counsel
2.  By Command
3.  By Concealment
4.  By Consent
5.  By Defense of the Evil Done
6.  By Partaking
7.  By Provocation
8.  By Praise or Flattery
9.  By Silence





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Monday, May 25, 2015

BASIC

Me on the left, behind our drill instructor, Sgt. Coon

I was in Basic Training in the 4th Platoon of Company D in the 3rd Battalion of the 1st Brigade in the United States Army, and I deserted. I was arrested and brought back the following day, soon enough to be charged only with being AWOL (absent without official leave). You can read more of the details of this adventure in the beginning of The Sky River Rock Festival and Lighter Than Air Fair. This caused a lot of paperwork for those in charge, and to avoid more paperwork they afterwards more or less left me alone while they continued to make it very hard for other basic trainees. And because it occurred during basic, it never went onto my permanent record.

My drill instructor was Sergeant Coon, a decent guy compared to most drill instructors, and most of us kind of liked him, in a masochistic sort of way. When basic was ending after the torturous two months, I had my brother (who ran a print shop back home) create a certificate of appreciation for Sgt. Coon. It was nicely framed, with non-glare glass. All of the platoon members signed it, and the day came in the barracks when we presented it to him. I was the one who did the talking and gave it to him, and when he saw it coming, he yelled, "Lund?!" Here the trainee who had run away and had been brought back under arrest, was the one now giving him a certificate of appreciation.

Out of embarrassment and not knowing how to respond, Sgt. Coon ordered us all into the infamous "cockroach position," which had been used as a form of punishment throughout basic. This was the only time we ever did it while laughing, and while the sergeant left the room, very moved. I don't think he wanted us to see what he then did.






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Friday, May 8, 2015

THE JUMPING SPIDER



There are all kinds and colors and sizes of jumping spiders, but they can be recognized by their large eyes and their resemblance to scruffy, super-energetic bulldogs. Their eyesight is excellent, and they turn really fast. You needn't fear these spiders.

Once when I was sitting by a lake in a nudist camp, one of these critters happened upon me. Somewhere I had heard before that they don't hurt you, so I managed to get it on the palm of my hand. The spider was twitching this way and that, sighting its whereabouts and options, and I put my other hand up, a few inches from the spider, and it stopped and stared at it. Then suddenly it jumped from one hand to the other! It then turned around and peered back at where it jumped from, and I moved my empty hand further away. To my delight, the spider jumped back. We continued this game, with me moving my hands further and further apart. It got to where it would have been a shorter distance to jump to my face, but the spider knew by then that the game was to jump from hand to hand.

Finally it missed its mark and fell short. It was then that I realized it lets out a very fine strand of silk as it jumps, and instead of falling to the ground, it simply swung down on the end of the silk and quickly climbed back up onto the hand it had jumped from and tried again.

I was amazed throughout this game with a jumping spider and have liked these odd creatures ever since. Next time you spot one, see if it wants to play. Nature can be a lot of fun.





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THE MALE CARPENTER BEE



Washington State friends, don't read this. You don't have these there. But for my friends in the southern and eastern U.S., including Missouri, remember when you see these huge bees hovering around, looking like bumblebees but with a big white spot on their faces, they are male carpenter bees and they can't sting. While the females (who don't have the white spot and can sting) hang around in and by their holes in the wood, these males just goof off and stare at you with curiosity, showing real activity only when they wrestle in the air with other males. They love to hover and watch me smoke my pipe on the porch, but so far none is brave enough to land on my offered hand. So be understanding: Curiosity might kill the cat, but it needn't kill the male carpenter bee.




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Wednesday, May 6, 2015

COUCH, SOFA, DAVENPORT, CHESTERFIELD, SETTEE, OR DIVAN




When I was growing up, my family called our couch a davenport. When I heard other people refer to theirs as a couch, I thought it was countrified. Well it turns out that Davenport was the name of a series of couches made in Massachusetts by A.H. Davenport and Company, now defunct. The furniture was so popular at the time that davenport became a generic trademark, like aspirin.

Now that I'm grown up and have my own family, we call our couch a couch, although I have called it a sofa. Come to find out, the term couch is used in North America and Australia, while the term sofa is generally used in the United Kingdom. In Canada it's often called a chesterfield.

Then there is a settee, which usually seats two people, like a loveseat, but sometimes seats more. And there's the divan, a long low sofa without a back or arms, usually placed against a wall.

Now that that's straightened out, when I was growing up, my family called our kitchen counter the sideboard. Now if I ever use the term sideboard my kids look at me funny.





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