Well, I did it again. It's been a long time since having fun with my glow-in-the-dark rubber squid. And now, from the same store--Archie McPhee--I recently bought a yodeling pickle! It's a large plastic pickle (batteries included), and when you push a button on it, it yodels loudly for about ten seconds. Believe me, everyone should have a yodeling pickle!
Well, of course I take it around my mail route. When I walk into a store or office and ask a woman alone, "Do you want to see my yodeling pickle?" she usually gives me a wary expression and hesitantly says, "Okay." If it's a group of women, they boldly say, "Sure!" If it's a man, he often says, "No."
Anyway, I took it into the barber shop, and asked, "Do you want to see my yodeling pickle?" The two barbers and two customers just stared at me, confused, and so I whipped out my yodeling pickle, pushed the button, and we listened to the pretty yodeling tune. They cracked up.
The next day, as I delivered mail to the barber shop, the two barbers were there, with customers, and one barber asked me, "Did you bring your yodeling pickle?"
I looked at him as though he were nuts, then asked the other barber, "Is he okay?" and walked out, leaving them to have to try to explain to their customers what a yodeling pickle is.
Check out McPhee.com. Last time my family and I were in Ballard, Washington, we spent hours and about $250 in their store, driving away with a car full of great unnecessities.
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I admire your balls. My career would be over in two seconds flat if I ever asked, "Would you like to see my yodeling pickle?"
ReplyDeleteI love to live on the edge. Delivering mail to the electric company, I asked, "Do you wanna see my geoduck?" They gave me a leery look and said, "Ooookay." And I held up my big rubber replica of a geoduck, which looks like a giant, gross dildo.
ReplyDeleteThen there were the days when I'd give unasked-for counsel, suddenly saying, "Remember, sex is not the answer." They'd give me another wary look, and I'd add, "Sex is the question. Yes is the answer."
People on the route liked me a lot, though, and no one ever complained.